Flash Fic Challenge: The Adventures of a Little Peppermill

 The Adventures of a Little Peppermill

Once there was and was not a little Peppermill,who lived in a cruet with her friends Saltcellar and Mustardpot.

One day, the little Peppermill decided to go for a walk, so she hopped out of the cruet and set off down the street.

She hadn't gone far when she came to a burger shop. All the burgers there were unhappy, and when she asked why, she learned that they were under pressure to produce tasty food, but had no one to make pepper.

"I can help!" said the little Peppermill, and she joined them in the shop, grinding away at pepper all day. She had fun doing it, but when she was finished, she was so tired that she went home and fell straight asleep.

And, as she went to sleep, so, my dear, must you.

Flash Fic Challenge: The Stage is Set (With a Cruet)

 The Stage is Set (With a Cruet)

Some bright spark had decided to put on a comic book themed retelling of Romeo and Juliet, complete with twirling capes and jokes so bad they were a crime against language.

Stage hand Mark winced as the actors bounced all over the outdoor stage, claiming that possession of the electronic cruet set that was passing rapidly between characters warranted arresting them (because it was a case of a salt and battery, groan).

"An electronic cruet? How shocking!" declared a wide eyed ingenue.

And then everyone declared they were going undercover to party, capes and all, the curtain came down, and that was his cue to dash on with the set change.

The play proceeded apace, until Freddie (playing Mercutio) turned out not to be acting stabbed, but actually stabbed, and Mark had to hastily drag a real, unconscious, bleeding body off the stage during set change, and call an ambulance.

Because the show must go on, and there was no need for the audience to know - right?

Flash Fic Challenge: Hammer and Tongs (and Bucket)

 Hammer and Tongs (and Bucket)

(This is set in my Olson College universe. Enjoy)

The gym was supposed to be empty at this time. Or at least, empty except for me and my cleaning equipment.

Instead, there were a couple of young adults going at each other with blunted practice weapons and rather sharper words. (Judging by the tone, anyway. It wasn't a language I spoke.) This is a college though, and I've been working as a cleaner here for years, so I know how to deal with young fools, most of the time.

I'd say the pair were going at each other hammer and tongs, but given the weaponry involved, it was more like oversized hammer and shortswords.

They didn't notice me enter.

The water in my bucket bounced hopefully at me. (Water likes me, it knows I'm a water creature at heart, which is useful for cleaning, but for anything bigger than a bucketful or so it's more like a friendly wave in passing than an active help.) I glanced at the water, so that it was still clean, and flicked my fingers. "Go for it."

The water leapt out of the bucket, into the air, and came down on the youngsters' heads.

They spluttered. And finally noticed that I was there. The slightly shorter and slimmer one bowed an apology, and elbowed the other, who copied him.

Then they left, and finally, the gym was empty. The water rolled around on the floor, and I jabbed a finger at the bucket until it reluctantly hopped back in, and let me start mopping.

Flash Fic Challenge: Thundering Hooves

 Thundering Hooves

Listen, my darlings, to the overhead roar,

And then listen to me, for I'll tell you more.

There was once a field where fine horses grazed

And along the edges, their riders lazed.

These riders were dining on cheese, fruit, and bread,

And one had a grapefruit as big as his head.

This chap tossed his grapefruit up into the air,

And a foal saw it fall with a bit of a scare.

The foal took off, away back to its mum,

With a sharp turn on speed, like Armageddon had come.

Now horses are twitchy, as I'm sure that you know.

If one horse is spooked, then the feeling will grow.

So the whole herd took off at a thundering run,

Right on the heels of the littlest one.

The riders jumped up, but all far too late,

For all they could do now was stand there and wait.

So when you eat grapefruit, don't toss it about,

Or you will hear thunder, without any doubt.